The Narcissistic Husband: 13 Warning Signs and Ways to Deal

Is your husband always putting himself first, disregarding your feelings, and controlling your every move? You may be married to a narcissistic husband. But don’t worry, you’re not alone. In this post, we’ll dive into what narcissism is, how to identify the signs of a narcissistic husband, and most importantly, how to deal with it. So, grab a cup of tea and get ready to take back control of your life.

Narcissism is a personality disorder that affects approximately 1% of the population. It is characterized by a grandiose sense of self-importance, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. Narcissists often have a distorted sense of reality, where they believe they are superior to others and entitled to special treatment.

When it comes to marriage, a narcissistic husband can be particularly challenging. Narcissistic husbands may exhibit controlling behavior, manipulation, emotional abuse, and a disregard for their partner’s feelings and needs. Identifying the signs of a narcissistic husband is crucial for protecting oneself from further harm and finding ways to cope with the situation.

Dealing with a narcissistic husband can be emotionally draining and challenging. However, it is important to identify and address the issue to avoid further emotional harm.

13 Signs of Narcissistic husband 

Here are some clear sings of a Narcissistic husband:

1. Always talking about himself

A narcissistic husband tends to dominate conversations, often steering them back to himself and his accomplishments. He may not show genuine interest in his wife’s life or struggles.

2. Narcissistic husband Expects special treatment

A narcissistic husband may feel entitled to preferential treatment, whether it’s in social situations, within the marriage, or even in public.

3. Disregards wife’s feelings

A narcissistic husband may dismiss his wife’s feelings, views, and needs, viewing them as irrelevant or insignificant compared to his own.

4. Makes everything about himself

A narcissistic husband may take any situation, good or bad, and turn it into a reflection of himself. For example, if his wife receives praise for something, he may become jealous and try to steal the spotlight.

5. Blames wife for his mistakes

A narcissistic husband often deflects blame and responsibility onto wife, even when it’s clear that he’s in the wrong.

6. Exhibits controlling behavior

A narcissistic husband may try to control his wife’s behavior, schedule, and activities, seeking to maintain a sense of power and control in the relationship.

7. Plays mind games

A narcissistic husband may engage in mind games and manipulation tactics to maintain control or get what he wants. He may use gaslighting, guilt-tripping, or withholding affection as ways to exert power over his wife.

8. Constantly seeks admiration

A narcissistic husband may crave admiration and praise, often fishing for compliments or trying to outdo others to get the spotlight.

8. Lacks empathy

He may be unable or unwilling to empathize with his wife’s emotions or experiences, seeing her as an extension of himself rather than an individual with her own feelings and needs.

9. Can’t handle criticism

A narcissistic husband may become defensive or angry when faced with criticism or feedback, even if it’s meant constructively. He may see any criticism as a personal attack on his character.

10. Neglectful or abusive towards kids

A narcissistic husband may treat his children as extensions of himself, demanding perfection and obedience. He may use his children to boost his own ego, neglect their needs, or be abusive towards them.

11. Acts like a victim Always

A narcissistic husband may play the victim in situations, twisting facts and emotions to make himself appear as the injured party. He may use this tactic to guilt his wife into doing what he wants.

12. Disrespectful towards intimacy

A narcissistic husband may lack respect for his wife’s emotional and physical needs, focusing instead on his own pleasure and satisfaction. He may not show affection or emotional connection during sex, and may use sex as a means to control or manipulate his wife.

Read about sexual narcissist to get the clear vision of a narcissist who use sex to control and manipulate a partner.

13. Jealous and possessive

A narcissistic husband may become jealous and possessive of his wife, seeking to control her actions and limit her interactions with others. He may become angry or aggressive if she spends time with friends or family without him.

13. Blatantly ignores boundaries

A narcissistic husband may blatantly ignore his wife’s boundaries, both physical and emotional. He may make demands or invade her space, expecting her to cater to his every need.

Is my husband is a narcissist or just selfish?

It can be challenging to differentiate between a husband who is a narcissist and one who is just selfish. Here are some differences between the two:

A. Intentions

A selfish person may put themselves first, but it is not necessarily malicious. A narcissistic person’s actions are often calculated to boost their own ego and manipulate others to get what they want.

B. Empathy

A selfish person may lack empathy for others, but a narcissistic person often lacks the capacity for empathy altogether. They may struggle to understand or care about their partner’s emotions and needs.

C. Relationships

A selfish person may have selfish tendencies in their relationships, but they are often still capable of forming healthy connections. A narcissistic person’s relationships tend to be one-sided, with the focus solely on their own needs and desires.

D. Behavior

A selfish person may exhibit selfish behavior, but it is not necessarily extreme or abusive. Narcissistic behavior can be manipulative, controlling, and emotionally abusive.

E. Perception of self

A selfish person may have a realistic view of their abilities and accomplishments. A narcissistic person may have an inflated sense of self-importance and believe they are superior to others.

Behavior of Narcissistic Husband with kids

A narcissistic husband may exhibit specific behaviors with his kids that are concerning and potentially harmful. Here are some examples:

A. Narcissistic husband use his children to fulfill his own needs

A narcissistic husband may see his children as extensions of himself and use them to fulfill his own needs for attention, validation, or control.

He may put undue pressure on his children to perform well in school, sports, or other activities to reflect positively on him.

B. Dismissing his children’s feelings

A narcissistic husband may dismiss or minimize his children’s feelings, opinions, or experiences. He may be critical or belittling, leading his children to feel unheard or invalidated.

C. Playing favorites

A narcissistic husband may play favorites with his children, elevating one child over the others and pitting them against each other. This can cause resentment and damage relationships within the family.

D. Being emotionally unavailable

A narcissistic husband may be emotionally unavailable to his children, lacking empathy or the ability to connect emotionally. He may not be present for important events or show interest in his children’s lives and experiences.

E. Being abusive

In extreme cases, a narcissistic husband may be emotionally or physically abusive towards his children. He may use threats or intimidation to control them, causing long-lasting trauma.

Long Term effects of being married to a Narcissist

Being married to a narcissistic husband can have long-term effects on a person’s emotional and mental well-being. Here are some examples of the potential long-term effects and the scientific evidence supporting them:

Emotional Trauma

A. Anxiety and Depression

Studies have shown that being in a relationship with a narcissist can lead to feelings of anxiety and depression. The constant criticism, gaslighting, and manipulation can lead to a sense of helplessness and low self-esteem.

B. Emotional Abuse

Narcissistic partners can engage in emotional abuse tactics such as gaslighting, belittling, and name-calling. These tactics can cause long-term emotional trauma.

Health Issues

A. Physical Symptoms

Stress-related illnesses such as high blood pressure, heart disease, and autoimmune disorders have been linked to chronic stress, which can be caused by being in a relationship with a narcissist.

B. Substance Abuse

Narcissistic relationships can cause high levels of stress and emotional trauma, which can lead to substance abuse as a coping mechanism.

Negative Effects on Future Relationships

A. Trust Issues

Being in a relationship with a narcissist can erode a person’s ability to trust others. A study found that people who had experienced emotional abuse had lower levels of trust in their future relationships.

B. Difficulty in Establishing Relationship

Being in a relationship with a narcissist can cause a person to lose their sense of self and identity. As a result, it can be difficult to establish healthy relationships in the future.

Financial Instability

A. Financial Control

Narcissistic partners can use financial control tactics to manipulate their partners. This can lead to financial instability and long-term financial consequences.

Is my husband is a narcissist test

While there are online quizzes and tests available on websites such as marriage.com that claim to help determine if your husband is a narcissist or not, it’s important to approach these resources with caution.

Self-administered quizzes or tests are not a substitute for a professional diagnosis.

While they may provide some insight into your husband’s behavior, it’s important to seek guidance from a mental health professional if you suspect your husband may have narcissistic personality disorder.

A trained mental health professional can provide a thorough evaluation and diagnosis, as well as recommend appropriate treatment options.

How to argue with a narcissistic husband?

Arguing with a narcissistic husband can be a difficult and frustrating experience, but there are some strategies that can help you manage conflicts and communication effectively:

A. Stick to the facts

Narcissistic individuals often have a tendency to twist or distort reality to fit their perspective. Focus on sticking to the facts and avoid getting sucked into an emotional argument.

B. Keep your emotions in check

Narcissists may use emotional manipulation as a way to control the situation. Stay calm and composed, and avoid reacting to your husband’s emotional outbursts.

C. Use assertive communication

Use “I” statements to express your feelings and concerns in a clear and concise way. For example, instead of saying “You never listen to me,” say “I feel frustrated when I don’t feel heard.”

D. Set clear expectations

Be clear about what you expect from the conversation, and don’t let your husband derail the discussion. If your husband tries to change the subject, bring the conversation back to the original point.

E. Be prepared to disengage

If your narcissistic husband becomes verbally or emotionally abusive, it’s important to be prepared to disengage from the conversation.

Let your husband know that you are willing to continue the conversation when he is calm and respectful.

How To survive a Narcissistic husband?

Surviving a relationship with a narcissistic husband can be challenging and emotionally draining. Here are 8 essential strategies that can help you navigate this difficult situation:

1. Set Boundaries

It’s important to set clear boundaries with your narcissistic husband to protect yourself emotionally and physically. These boundaries may include limits on his behavior or communication, as well as physical boundaries.

2. Practice Self-Care

Narcissistic relationships can be stressful and exhausting. Prioritize self-care practices such as exercise, meditation, and therapy to manage your emotional and mental health.

3. Seek Support

Reach out to trusted friends and family members for emotional support. You may also benefit from joining a support group or seeking the guidance of a therapist.

4. Focus on Reality

Narcissistic husbands often distort or deny reality to suit their needs. Stay grounded in reality and avoid getting sucked into their manipulations.

5. Learn to Say No

Narcissists often have a strong need for control and may try to manipulate or guilt you into doing what they want.

Learning to say no and setting healthy boundaries can help you maintain your sense of autonomy.

6. Practice Assertiveness

Use assertive communication to express your feelings and needs clearly and directly. This can help you maintain control of the conversation and avoid getting sidetracked by your husband’s manipulations.

7. Keep Records

Keep a record of any abusive or manipulative behavior from your husband. This can be useful if you need to seek legal protection or counseling.

8. Plan for the Future

It’s important to have a plan for the future, whether that means leaving the relationship or finding ways to cope with your husband’s behavior. Develop a plan with the help of a therapist or trusted advisor to help you move forward with confidence.

Leaving or Divorcing a Narcissistic husband

Leaving or divorcing a narcissistic husband can be a difficult and complex process, but it is often necessary for your emotional and physical well-being. If you are considering leaving or divorcing a narcissistic husband, there are some important things to consider.

First and foremost, your safety is the top priority. If you are in an abusive relationship, make a safety plan and consider seeking help from a domestic violence hotline or shelter. It is also important to seek legal advice, as divorcing a narcissistic husband can be complicated.

Keep a record of any abusive or manipulative behavior, and seek support from trusted friends and family members, a therapist, or a support group. Stay focused on your goals, prioritize self-care practices, and be prepared for resistance from your husband, who may resist your efforts to leave or divorce them due to their strong need for control.

By taking these steps, you can navigate the process of leaving or divorcing a narcissistic husband with confidence and find a path forward that is healthy and fulfilling for you.

Frequently Asked Questions about Narcissistic husband

1. Do narcissistic husbands love their wives?

Narcissistic husbands may appear to love their wives, but in reality, their love is often conditional and self-serving. Narcissistic individuals are primarily focused on their own needs and desires, and they often use their relationships to bolster their own self-esteem and sense of power and control.

2. How does a narcissist view his wife?

A narcissist often views his wife as an extension of himself, rather than as an individual with her own thoughts, feelings, and desires. He may use his wife to meet his own needs for validation, admiration, and control, rather than seeing her as a separate person with her own needs and desires.

How does a narcissist abuse his wife?

A narcissist may abuse his wife in various ways, including emotional manipulation, gaslighting, and physical or sexual abuse. He may use his wife to meet his own needs for validation and control, belittle and criticize her, blame her for his own faults and mistakes, and undermine her self-esteem and sense of worth

Final thoughts

In conclusion, being married to a narcissistic husband can be a challenging and emotionally draining experience. However, by understanding the signs and developing effective coping strategies, you can protect your emotional and mental well-being.

Remember to prioritize self-care, seek support, and set clear boundaries with your husband. With time, patience, and persistence, it is possible to navigate a relationship with a narcissistic husband and find a path forward that is healthy and fulfilling for you.